Figurski at Findhorn on Acid

2.3.06

[Totalled black Mercedes in Paris tunnel. Two paparazzi exchange money and mechanical pig, others pick through wreckage. Constant camera flashes. Morcheeba's "Over and Over" plays eerily on invisible speakers (I'm falling over and over and over and over again now/ Calling over and over and over and over again...). Dying moans from driver Henri Paul and passengers John "Trevor Rees-Jones" Cleese, Frank "Dodi al Fayed" Figurski, F.M. "Princess Diana" Vieuchanger.]

Vieuchanger: Frank! I mean Dodi. Listen, it was the pig they were after!

[Pause.]

Vieuchanger: You hear me? I say, the paparazzi were after the pig, not me! I mean, not Di! See now, they're getting away.

Figurski: Uhhnnn. [Labored.] Holo-pig.

Vieuchanger: It has to be a simulation, of course, since you have the real ones.

Figurski [croaking]: Tell me, where is it?

Vieuchanger: Where's ... what?

Figurski: You know. What you stole from me. It's in the bag, isn't it.

[More dying sounds, camera flashes. All expire except Figurski and Vieuchanger.]

Vieuchanger: You're one to talk about stealing.

[Figurski dies with a final twitch.]

Vieuchanger: Wait a minute! Frank. Dodi. I mean Frank, you can't die in here, with the safety on. Unless ...

[Vieuchanger reaches through the wreckage, pushing aside Henri Paul's pale, limp, bloody limbs, feeling for Figurski's body. All suddenly dematerialize, with hallucinogenic visual flourish, except Vieuchanger. Then the Mercedes and Paris scenery dematerialize too, and only Vieuchanger and her large sequined bag are left on the generic, gridlined Holodeck floor surrounded by circuitry and matter replicators. The replicators make a few spurts and sparkles, like random nerves firing.]

Vieuchanger [calling out]: Bastard. At what point did you substitute a holo-character for yourself?

Voice of Figurski [over loudspeaker, with echoes]: I'll take what's in the bag now.

[Vieuchanger clutches bag to chest and looks around. Figurski's voice seems to be coming from all directions at once.]

Voice of Figurski: I've sealed the Holodeck, Fatima. Slide the bag into the archway, nice and easy, or I will put you through holo-Hell.

View Lexia Map
View Global Map
Characters
Places
Artifacts
1x
2x
3x
Notes