— Fatima, you get down on your hands and knees behind him, then I'll push him over.
— No, Tho, YOU get down on your hands and knees behind him.
— OK how about this: I have kitchen duty tonight, so at the end of dinner you convince me to show off a little flipping and juggling. I'll work my way around the room, dramatically with several near-misses, until I'm right in front of Figurski. You take this opportunity….
— To sneak out and get the pigs from his room. Unless he has moved them.
— He hasn't. I saw them there after lunch. Just follow the Spam.
— Right. So I'll just pick up the pigs, assuming I can lift them both together, and….
— Put them in my room. It's closer to his. Here's the key.
— Right. Wrong. I'll put ONE pig in your room, and one in mine.
— Only one problem with this plan. How will you get into his room?
— With my key. Or yours.
— They're all the same?
— Identical. It's in the fine print on the Findhorn sign-in. “Keys offered as a convenience only” or something.
— Oh, this will be great.