Figurski at Findhorn on Acid

Chronology

180-130 million BC

Jurassic Period, first small mammals appear

1260-1390

Probable origin of Shroud of Turin

1720s

Rosellini allegedly visits Fez, Morocco

1737

Mechanical pig designed and built by Rosellini

1738

Vaucanson builds duck automaton

1740s

Rosellini's mechanical pig exhibited in major European cities

1752

Mechanical pig possibly destroyed in Rome hotel fire; Rosellini dies

1769

Von Kempelen builds Turkish chess player automaton

1884

Rosellini forgery allegedly crafted by van Gelderschott

1887

Mechanical pig shown at Paris Exhibition

1900

L. Frank Baum publishes The Wonderful Wizard of Oz

1908

Sir Robert Baden-Powell publishes Scouting for Boys in six parts

1924

L. Ron Hubbard becomes Eagle Scout, possibly the pinnacle of his career

1930

Eugene Zanger born

Frenchman Michel Vieuchange dies after reaching the forbidden city of Smara in North Africa by disguising himself as a woman

First Masonic Lodge (No. 488, Glenferri, Victoria, Australia) to be named after Boy Scout founder Robert Baden-Powell

1937

Spam developed

1938

LSD synthesized

1940

Spam singing commercial performed by George Burns and Gracie Allen

1945

Figurski born

1950s

LSD research performed by U.S. military

Casa de Fruta begins as cherry stand

Spam is “Miracle Meat,” “Meat of 1000 Uses,” etc.

1952

Kindred Lodges Association formed, first gathering of Masonic Scouters or Scout-Masons at Scout House, London

1958

Vieuchanger born

1959

Spam thieves in Monte Vista, CO, take only $1.00, tobacco, and Spam from store

Chinese Year of the Pig

1960

Spam 7 oz. cans introduced along with traditional 12-oz.

1960s

More LSD experiments performed by U.S. military

Casa de Fruta expands with gas and food

Spam sales plummet

1961-1963

Timothy Leary and Harvard colleagues conduct Concord State Prison experiment, studying therapeutic psilocybin use for prisoners

1962

Findhorn founded

1963

JFK assassinated same day that Aldous Huxley dies of cancer after injecting 200 mm LSD

1965

LSD made illegal

1966

Figurski enters Harvard grad school

1969

Original Star Trek series canceled after third season

1970

Monty Python's Flying Circus Spam sketch performed

Four students killed by National Guard at Kent State University

1970s

Casa de Fruta expands

Heyday of Ralph the Swimming Pig at Aquarena Springs, Texas roadside attraction

Counterculture, use of hashish and LSD peak, then decline

Rumors circulate about giant plants and vegetables at Findhorn

1971

Nguyen Van Tho born

Spam Smoke-Flavored introduced

Chinese Year of the Pig

1972

Gerald (Little Milton) Bostock publishes "Thick as a Brick" in St. Cleve Chronicle & Linwell Advertiser

1973

Zanger becomes The World-Famous Cup Flipper at Casa de Fruta

Nguyen loses hands to Spam booby-trap

1979

Survival Research Laboratories founded by Mark Pauline

1980s

Findhorn promotes educational programs, begins Eco-Village

Disco, cocaine, and Reaganites throttle '70s counterculture

1984

Survival Research Laboratories performs ON BROADWAY THEATRE

1985-1986

Meatpackers Local P-9 conduct 13-month strike at Hormel Foods plant

1986

Spam Less Salt introduced

1987

Nguyen hired as busboy at Casa de Fruta

Zanger appears on David Letterman Show

Figurski convicted of killing Harvard math professor

First season of Star Trek: The Next Generation airs

1987-1989

Nguyen practices cup-flipping skills

1987-1993

Figurski serves time in Concord and Walpole State Prisons, Massachusetts

1988

Carbon-14 tests reveal Shroud of Turin to be medieval forgery

1990

Nguyen takes his cup-flipping show on the road

Apparition appears to Mrs. Lorac in her shower stall

"Is Rock Dead?" theme week airs on NPR's Fresh Hair® with Merry Gross

U.S. government orders $44.4 million of Hormel Top Shelf in preparation for Gulf War

1990s

Spam Breakfast Strips, Spam Lite introduced; annual recipe contests, Spamarama, Spam Carving Festival debut; Spam newsgroups, websites, Haiku Archive appear on Internet

1991

Vieuchanger works undercover with U.S. commandos trying to assassinate Saddam Hussein, sells movie rights to resulting story

Shower-Lourdes Society founded by Vladimir Lorac

Saudis nix Spam for U.S. soldiers serving in Gulf

Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry dies, wife saves ashes in jar

Barbara Kopple makes documentary about strike of Austin, MN, Hormel plant

1992

Ross Perot runs unsuccessful, somewhat scary third-party campaign for U.S. presidency

1993

Figurski paroled, offered job by NY Transit Authority, disappears after identity discovered, goes to Findhorn

Vieuchanger goes to Shower-Lourdes

Final season of Star Trek: The Next Generation airs

Graphical Web browsers jumpstart Internet revolution

1994

Nguyen goes to Shower-Lourdes, then Findhorn

Vieuchanger goes to Findhorn

Figurski goes to Shower-Lourdes

Five billionth can of Spam produced

Ronald Reagan's Alzheimer's disease disclosed, to little surprise

1995

Child-star Jon-Benet Ramsey murdered in her Colorado home under suspicious circumstances

1996

Nguyen stops performing, drops out

Ralph the Swimming Pig retires from Aquarena Springs, TX, roadside attraction

Timothy Leary dies

Unabomber Theodore Kaczynski arrested

1997

Local bishop hands investigation of Shower-Lourdes apparition over to Archdiocese

Figurski and Nguyen meet at Findhorn, then at Shower-Lourdes

Figurski and Vieuchanger meet at Findhorn, then at Shower-Lourdes

Nguyen and Vieuchanger meet at Findhorn, then at Shower-Lourdes

Allen Ginsburg dies

Jacques Cousteau dies at 87

Princess Diana dies in Paris car crash; funeral in London draws millions

Mother Theresa dies in Calcutta at 87, world mourns

Ashes of Gene Roddenberry and Timothy Leary launched together into space by Celestis, Inc.

Hormel threatens trademark suit against self-described Internet "Spam King" Sanford Wallace

Sportscaster Marv Albert convicted of forcible sodomy and dental assault while wearing panties

1998

Shroud of Turin goes on display for fourth time in 20th century

Secret death of Carlos Castaneda revealed

1999

Antitrust judge declares Microsoft a monopoly

Paul Bowles dies in Tangier

Hormel Foods announces plans for 16,550 square foot Spam Museum and Visitors' Center

1999-2000

Y2K computer bug proves a flop, while millions mistakenly celebrate new millennium which won't start for another year

2000

Hormel Foods corporate office sends trademark violation warning letter about "Pig Newtons" recipe posted on Bob Gorman's Page O'Spam

2000-2001

Figurski, Nguyen, and Vieuchanger all on the same page at the millennial cusp, meet at Findhorn, then at Shower-Lourdes

2010

Alan Richardson publishes 145.txt, has return engagement on NPR's Fresh Hair®

Stardate 2364

Bynars upgrade the Holodeck on USS Enterprise D

Stardate 9312

Nguyen has first Holodeck experience

Stardate 9401

Figurski has first Holodeck experience

Stardate 9402

Vieuchanger has first Holodeck experience

Stardate 9709

Figurski, Nguyen, and Vieuchanger return to the Holodeck in pairs

Stardate 0012

Figurski, Nguyen, and Vieuchanger appear on the Holodeck all together

TIME

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Chronology

Introduction

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Characters

Places

Artifacts

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2x

3x

Notes

acknowledgements

examples

Time

Figurski 1.x

Cup Flipper 1.x

Vieuchanger 1.x

Findhorn 1.x

Shower Lourdes 1.x

Holodeck 1.x

Acid 1.x

Spam 1.x

Pig 1.x

1.1

1.2

1.3

2.1

2.2

2.3

3.1

3.2

3.3

doorway/structure

hallucincation/dreamvision

freedom/fear_o’writing

pig_love

automaton!

meat/death

devil/god/angel

digestion/cannibalism

time/end_o’journey

note about notes

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Figurski 2.x

Figurski 3.x

Cup-Flipper 2.x

Cup-Flipper 3.x

Vieuchanger 2.x

Vieuchanger 3.x

Findhorn 2.x

Findhorn 3.x

Shower Lourdes 2.x

Shower Lourdes 3.x

Holodeck 2.x

Holodeck 3.x

Acid 2.x

Acid 3.x

Spam 2.x

Spam 3.x

Pig 2.x

Pig 3.x

1.1.01

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Chronology